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Bob and Marcia's First Acts of Retirement
MARCIA
Good Morning, Bob. Hope you had a good night’s sleep. I made breakfast—your
favorite—
BOB
(mocking Marcia) Hope you had a good night’s sleep. What’d you expect me
to do? This is my first day of retirement, and I can’t stand it. (Bob
plops down in his favorite chair)
MARCIA
(hands Bob a tray with food) Here’s your breakfast. Want me to hand you the TV
remote?
BOB
Oh, thank you….and yes.
MARCIA
Well, Bob, I was thinkin’ while I was making breakfast.
BOB
There’s a first time for everything.
MARCIA
(ignores Bob) I was thinking that now that we’re both retired we could volunteer
somewhere.
BOB
Volunteer, Shmolunteer. Why would I waste my time?
MARCIA
Ohhh, Bob. You just forgot. Remember when your parents were shut in in
their home?
BOB
Yeah, how could I forget it. They were unbearable.
MARCIA
Remember Meals On Wheels? They came every day and brought food and—
BOB
Those do-gooders! I remember them. They tried to pray with my parents all the
time and I kicked them out.
MARCIA
Yeah, you were a little mean.
BOB
Yeah, right—I was so mean, keepin’ them from praying their gibberish in my
parents home.
MARCIA
Well, Bob, I hope you won’t get angry with me.
BOB
What’d you do now, Marcia? (stands up, putting his food on a side table) Argh!
I can’t stand it when you act on one your goofy ideas!
MARCIA
I invited the Meals On Wheels folks to stop by today.
BOB
You did what?
MARCIA
Yeah, they’re going to stop by and explain the program and help us apply and get
a background check—
BOB
Wow, Marcia, I thought we talked about this. NO MORE GOOFY IDEAS, remember?
MARCIA
I remember, Bob. It’s just that I know you would never agree to the first
meeting, so I just want you to hear what they got to say—
BOB
Well, I don’t wanna hear it--
(doorbell rings)
MARCIA
I think that’s them. (exit, stage left)
BOB
(looks up to heaven) Dear Lord, please help me with this.
MARCIA
(returns on stage, with two people following)
Oh, Bob, I’m so excited--this is the Meals On Wheels folks. This is
Henry and Vivian.
HENRY
Good Morning, Bob. It’s good to meet you. (extends his right hand; he has a
briefcase in his left hand)
BOB
(shakes Henry’s hand) Good Mornin’, I suppose. (glares at
Marcia)
VIVIAN
Good Morning, Bob. I’ve heard so many good things about you – it’s good to
finally meet you.
(extends her right hand)
BOB
(shakes Vivian’s hand) Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, what’s this all about? You need
a blood test, fingerprints or somethin’?
MARCIA
Oh, please, please sit down.
(Bob sits in his chair, Marcia sits in the one next to it; Henry and Vivan sit
on a couch)
HENRY
(laughs at Bob) Oh, nothing that serious. We have a simple application form and
a background check form. It should only take about 5-to-10 minutes to fill them
both out.
(reaches into his briefcase and pulls out some papers).
MARCIA
Okay, so, how does Meals On Wheels work?
VIVIAN
Here, let me read from the Meals On Wheels brochure:
Hunger is a serious threat facing millions of seniors in the U.S.A. and the
problem grows every year. As the number of seniors at risk of hunger grows, so
too does the need for Meals On Wheels volunteers. We need as many
volunteers as we can get. Meals On Wheels programs nationwide face high
food and gas prices, waiting lists for clients and funding cuts. More than ever,
they need volunteers to keep their programs going – and to keep hungry seniors
fed. Reliable volunteers are critical for our Member programs.
BOB
So, whaddya want us to do?
HENRY
Drivers pick up meals at a central location then follow a route, making several
stops along the way to deliver to Meals On Wheels recipients. A driver
works with a “runner” who takes the meal from the car to the door of the
seniors’ homes.
MARCIA
Ohhhh, I see.
BOB
Okay, if I’m gonna do this, I’m gonna be the driver.
MARCIA
Oh, thank God! This is wonderful. I’ll be the runner, then.
HENRY
Excellent! Now that you know what you want to do, let’s get the paperwork
completed; but first, let’s pray.
BOB
Oh no, here we go.
MARCIA
Oh, Bob, it can’t hurt.
BOB
You’re right. We can pray, but then we need to act on it.
--bro. tim pickl
Monday September 14, 2009 A.D.
Originally posted on FaithWriters -- Check it out:
http://www.faithwriters.com/wc-article-level3-previous.php?id=31707
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