How Great Thou Art
The Three Stooges as Church Art Dealers

http://www.threestooges.com/

MOE
Good Morning, boys! (turns on the light)
Rise and shine, rise and shine!

LARRY
What’s the big idea? (rubbing his eyes)
I thought we could sleep in today!?

MOE
Wise guy, eh? Get outta bed!

LARRY
Okay, okay!

CURLY
(yawns….then) Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!

MOE
What’s so funny?

CURLY
Hey fellas, I can't hear anything!

MOE/LARRY
Why not?

CURLY
Cuz I ain't listenin'!

MOE
How stupid can you get?
Come on, now, get up we gotta get goin’.

LARRY
Okay, Moe! Which church are we going to today?

MOE
Let me check our calendar!
(pulls out a large desk calendar, rolled up in his sleeve)
Hmmmmm…I can barely read it….


CURLY
Hmmmmm… lemme see! (tries to grab the calendar)

MOE
You knucklehead! (hits him on the head with the calendar)
It says the Saint-Paul’s-Abundant-Life-Tabernacle-of-Joy-
Baptist-Apostolic-Pentecostal-Church-of-God-in-Christ-
of-the-Born-Again-Believers-in-Jesus-Name…Church!
…Arthur Cowlick, Pastor.

LARRY
ohhhh, I’ve heard of that one—it’s the
SPALTOJ-BAPCOGIC-BABJN church!
It’s right down the Highway!

CURLY
I dunno if I wanna to go to a SPALTOJ-LOGIC choich!

MOE
You chucklehead! (hits him with the calendar)

CURLY
Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo!

MOE
We ain’t got any choice--we signed a contract
with Pastor Cowlick! Oh come on—we ain’t got all day—let’s go!
(the 3 exit)

(the 3 enter the church, carrying paintings)

MOE
Good Morning, Pastor Art! It’s is so good to see you again sir.
I brought my able assistants today. This is Larry.

LARRY
Good Morning, sir.

MOE
And, this is Curly.

CURLY
Good Moining, Pastor, sir. Did you say his name was Art?
That’s funny, because we brought art, too! Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk…

MOE
Wise guy, eh? (motions to poke Curly in the eyes)


LARRY
Whoa, Moe! Not in front of the Pastor!

MOE
Yer lucky, Curly. (Curly sticks his tongue out at Moe)
Why, you--

LARRY
Hey-hey-hey, Whoa, Moe!

COWLICK
So, what do you gentlemen have to show me today?

MOE
Thank you for your patience, sir. My friends here, are
how-shall-we-say—church challenged?!!

LARRY
(to Curly) Yeah, right! He never even heard of
SPALTOJ-BAPCOGIC-BABJN church before today!

MOE
We have here the finest church paintings this side of the
Moses-ipppi. Take this one for example (shows it to Cowlick)--
it shows a beautiful pasture, the sun shining bright—and cows
and cattle standing like statues without a care in the world—

CURLY
ohhhhh….. I get it, now! Art Cowlick—Cowlick Art!
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk! Nyuk, nyuk--

MOE
(attacks Curly with the painting)
You apple head! (the painting rips)
Now look what you made me do—

COWLICK
Gentlemen, gentlemen, please—settle down. I have a story to tell you.

LARRY
ohhhhh, I love stories, especially at bed time—

MOE
You nitwit, you!

CURLY
Shhhhhh…. Pasto Cowlick is speaking--

COWLICK
A long time ago, in a country far, far away—

LARRY
Ooo-- I saw this movie!

MOE
HUSH!

COWLICK
There was a man named Jesus. He wasn’t just a man--
He was the Messiah—Immanuel—God manifest in the flesh.
One day when he was teaching his disciples, his friends, he said
“I tell you the truth, whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden
in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.
I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything
you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. For where two or three
gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”
(Matthew 18:18-20 NLT)

LARRY
Wow….that’s awesome, Pastor Cowlick…

COWLICK
So, since there are three of you, when you pray, Jesus will be in the midst of you.

CURLY
Hey, I hear music!
(piano softly plays How Great Thou Art)
(starts singing) O Lord my God,
When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds
Thy Hands have made;

CURLY AND LARRY
(sings) I see the stars,
I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout
The universe displayed.

THE THREE
(sings)
Then sings my soul,
My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art,
How great Thou art.
Then sings my soul,
My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art,
How great Thou art!

MOE
Thank you, Pastor Art! We agree right now to give you
all of this art, at no charge! Right, boys?!?

CURLY
That’s roight!

LARRY
Yes, sir!

THE THREE
(march out, singing faster)
Then sings my soul,
My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art,
How great Thou art!
 

--bro. tim pickl
Thursday April 12, 2007 A.D.

also see:  http://www.faithwriters.com/wc-article-level1-previous.php?id=15025

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